jahmietheshort1's Xanga

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

Wed, 25 Oct 2006 03:56:39 GMT

I've kind of moved to a different site. :\

Saturday, September 23, 2006

Sat, 23 Sep 2006 18:31:21 GMT

Ok there's fun stuff happening. Like videos.

Thursday, September 14, 2006

Thu, 14 Sep 2006 04:12:43 GMT

Ok well it's been a relatively uneventful week.
Other than my youtubeness. I have a small following now. And it's fun.
And I love watching the British people on there. I think that accent is so sexy.
I think I might have to move over there so I can find me a sexy speaking British lad :)

Anyyyyyyway.

I'm just waiting for Friday and Saturday to come.

It's late though. Sleep is good.

Sunday, September 10, 2006

Sun, 10 Sep 2006 09:21:15 GMT

I recorded little singing and dancing clips over the course of last night and I pieced them together in this masterpiece.
It's pretty much me being silly.
It's real short and (I think) pretty entertaining so if you want to watch then go right ahead!

Thursday, September 07, 2006

Thu, 07 Sep 2006 03:39:22 GMT

Ok so that video is called "Old T-Shirts + Midnight Loving".
It's exciting and you should watch it. (That frame of me looks retarded though.)

Also I'm a youtube director now. And so is Holly ho. And it's amazing.

I have had a gigantic headache all day.
We did chair auditions and I stopped two notes into it and pretty much yelled "I have spit" because there was spit in my trumpet!
I missed the first couple notes just because of nerves but once I got past that and started playing I completely aced the thing.
So I better be first chair or else I'll be doing some ass kicking.....to myself.

Anyway I'm feeling happier than I have lately right at this very second and it's nice.
I think I'm just overall stressed out and that's not going to get better and I'm still dealing with the whole Kyle thing.
And I have a right to be upset still. I spent two years with him and I loved him almost every minute of it.
It's hard to lose something like that and now I know why there's so many broken heart songs. ha

But besides that...I'm beginning to realize that there are other people there for me that I can rely on to be there.
I put my whole trust in one person to deal with me and listen to my crap when I should be spreading it evenly to everybody!
Because like...even my mom is there to talk to me. And my sister. Then all these band friends that I thought just wanted to have fun with me...
(Non sexual, of course. get your mind out of the gutter)
...they're all there too. Like Blaine and Don and Kaitlyn and pretty much most of my trumpet homies.

And of course I have my Julia, and Holly, and Meg. I love those guys so so much.

So pretty much to sum this up, I'm adapting. I'm learning. I'm making new friends. And I'm trying to rely on myself and a number of other people rather than one person.
Because as Don said, I don't need to rely on a guy to keep me happy. Or something along those lines.
It's just a learning process and it's a new time in my life, I suppose.
Of course any support and loving towards me is well appreciated and I'm always up for a good hug. And it's going to take a little bit of time.
But in some time I'll be okay. I'll be just fine and I won't be sad so much anymore and I'll be 100 times stronger because of this.

So until later. Adios lovers.

A couple Dome Game pictures for your viewing pleasure:

Jessica and Me before leaving

Band bus with Andrew.

New uniforms with Drew

Ok sleep time!

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Tue, 05 Sep 2006 05:27:52 GMT

^That's my music video of what I did on Labor Day with Holly. Julia hung out with me later so she's barely in the video.
But it's short and you might enjoy it.

I'm really getting sick of being all depressed pretty much every night.
But then again I bring it on myself by looking through old conversations and pictures and such.
I am such a dumbass. I'm just feeling sorry for myself. But then I'm like well, I have reasons to feel sorry for myself.

Like my horribly bad luck last month. Seriously, I would love to know what I did to deserve all that.
And now I'm dealing with the aftermath of all the crappy stuff that happened to me.
Since I've become a pessimist in the past year or so, it's hard for me to look for the good things.
So let's go through a little list of pros and cons of the "bad" things that have happened. Ok.

Appendectomy-
CONS:
1. I can't say I haven't been to the hospital besides birth anymore.
2. Pain of both the appendicitis and the surgery aftermath
3. 1 week of school work to make up
4. Hard to sleep.
5. I'm still tired a lot more than usual
6. 3 scars on my stomach
7. My abs got less hard
8. Oh...did I mention recovery pain? Yeah.
9. Couldn't play my trumpet to get into winds so I'm stuck in concert now
10. Missed tryouts for parts in musical
PROS:
1. 1 week off school
2. Presents and such from various people
3. People being concerned about me
4. I got out of the hospital only a few hours after my surgery
5. Excuse not to do pushups or other physical activities

The Breakup-
CONS:
1. No Kyle
2. No love
3. No boyfriend
4. Nobody to talk to every day
5. 2 wasted years
6. The "heartbreak"
7. Kyle hardly ever speaking with me unless necessary
8. The avoidance
9. Homecoming coming up and me having gone with him the past 2 years
10. Basically the list could go on and on and I'd just be feeling worse and worse.
PROS:
1. I can now take up my desired career track as a slut bag trumpet whore just like everyone else wants me to.
2. I can have sexual relations with 100 different men in a weeks time
3. No guilt about my sexual escapades
4. I Can Make Up Stupid Pros That Aren't True About What's Good About Not Having Kyle

Band-
CONS:
1. Ended up in concert because I had two 6th periods I needed to get fixed and I couldn't play to try out for winds
2. Concert band pretty much sucks ass.
3. The band directors hate me because I don't tell enough people to shutup
4. The leaders of my section are getting annoyed with me because I had too much loud and retarded fun on the band bus
5. I have a playing test tomorrow that I'm going to fail
6. When I fail the playing test, I'll be placed beneath the freshman I'm supposed to be "leading"
7. I hear crap about band sucking from people at lunch all the time
8. Marching practice after school when I'm so tired after school every day from not being able to sleep from being sad over dumbass and surgery tiredness too
PROS:
1. I love band
2. I generally have fun with my band friends
3. I enjoy playing music
4. Band is actually something I thought I could do partially well

Theatre-
CONS:
1. I missed tryouts so I couldn't even get a good background part. No dancing even.
2. I don't really "know" anybody and the people I do know don't talk to me
3. I don't feel like I'm good enough to be in that class
4. I got a sickness when I went back to school so my singing isn't top notch
5. I have to see Kyle act like I don't matter or like I'm not there every day
6. Practice on my birthday. What in the hell.
7. Conflicts with band a lot.
8. Kyle's the one who said I should try out for the class and he doesn't even speak to me
PROS:
1. Generally good, entertaining people in there
2. I get a hug from Joey most of the time which cheers me up that somebody actually acknowledges me
3. I like singing in the big group since I've never really done anything like that before
4. Watching everybody perform is fun because they're so talented

And I guess that's the main things on my list of why I'm all saddish lately.

Anyway. I applied for a director's account on youtube. Hopefully that'll work out.
It's extremely late and I'm going to get next to no sleep.
Nobody is reading this so why am I writing?

I guess I'll go lay down or something...go me.

Adios

Monday, September 04, 2006

Mon, 04 Sep 2006 07:38:33 GMT

It's sad that I can put the notes and movie tickets into a box and shove it under my nightstand
But I can't bring myself to take that glass flower he got me from Helen and put it where the notes now are.
I can't even take down all the pictures of us, I'm that stupid.
So there's pictures of us everywhere, just reminding me of what got thrown away a month ago.

I shouldn't be sad and I should tear them down and never want to look at them again.
I mean, that would be the smart thing to do, right?
I guess I'm just not very smart and everywhere I turn I see us and it makes me sad.

ok.

Video time:

First is a videoblog. Second is- Disco Dance Party: A Musical Video Journey

Ok enjoy. It's time to sleep.

Annddd...somebody was emoting last night. Sorry guys. But that musical journey through time up there is pretty so you should watch it rather than my emoting videoblog. Ok. Ok.

And Julia and Holly better call me soon.

Friday, September 01, 2006

Fri, 01 Sep 2006 02:32:45 GMT

My xanga is 777 days old. How crazy is that? I've been using this thing since the summer before freshman year. Woh.

Anyway band practice had no marching in it today because it was rainy
I have to take two tests that I got out of sometime soon. Preferably I'll just take the precal one tomorrow.
I took a 2ish hour nap after band practice and dinner and I had a weird dream.

My weekend will be filled with trumpetness. I'm pretty excited because I love those people.
Tomorrow we're supposed to go to Blaine's or something and then later that night I'm off to Jessica's for the annual TGA sleepover.
Then we wake up and eat food and go to Brandon's for the annual trumpet cookout. (We all got out of having to go to the freshman brunch thing)
After the cookout we meet at school at 1 and go to the CNN center for lunch and then the dome game!
And after the dome game hopefully we'll go to Sonic or Waffle House for foods because I'll be hungry.
I'm excited if you can't tell.

I uploaded a ton of new videos so check them out if you're anywhere near interested even though most are ridiculously retarded.

Then of course there's pictures on my facebook.

Here's my latest videoblog thingy. It's so exciting! Yippee!

I think that's all though! Adios

Monday, August 28, 2006

Mon, 28 Aug 2006 01:33:57 GMT

Instead of doing precal I'm watching the Emmy Awards because I love my celebrities. So there.
I caught the most recent band sickness, now isn't that nice?
You think I can get out of my precal test another day?
I think so since I did lost a week of review. So hopefully.

Youtube is being a butthead so I can put a video here when it stops hating me.
I have quite a few videos in line to be uploaded.

So I'm still recovering from surgery I guess. I get tired really easily. But oh well.
I'm doing everything I usually do. I'm even marching and it's only been exactly two weeks.
I'm like a warrior!

I've spent pretty much all weekend with Blaine and Brandon. Because they're pretty much awesome.
We went bowling and targetting and bordersing. And hung out at Brandon's too. It was intense.

Anyway, since I wish I was on the emmy's and I so would win an award of course, I decided to create my shoutouts to my hos and various other supporters of my shenanigans:

"Thank you my lovers, thank you. Wow, this thing is heavy.
I just..I just want to thank my ho Holly for being my lover and speaking to me each and every day despite my lack of interesting conversation.
You've always been there for me and I just love you (tears start)...so much.
Thank you to Julia for brightening my days and commenting my myspace pictures. Also Holly for commenting my myspace pictures.
That little "new picture comments" clicky word makes my heart a happy one.
I'd like to thank Meg for being Meg. You're so very beautiful to me.
They're the best three costars I could ever hope to work with each and every day of my life...
Then I thank my bandies. Because I love them. Mostly the trumpet section, because we're basically the best ever.
I'd like to thank Kyle for nothing. After two years all you are to me is a "poke" on facebook and a few distant memories.
(music starts playing) No no no no! Um...um...thank you...family! And uh...the internet. Yes. I love you guys!"

And the speech is over.

Alright I finally got to one of the new videos I uploaded.

Sunday, August 20, 2006

Sun, 20 Aug 2006 22:45:48 GMT

My scars minus the tape as of today. Little aren't they?

So anyway. I'm going to school tomorrow for my very own first day of school extravaganza!
Except it's more like stumbling through the day and hoping band doesn't mind if I kind of skip out on it...
And hoping I have time in the morning to get my wrong, but still more updated schedule plus explain myself to band
I'm scared.

So now I'm getting myself ready. I have a bazillion things to do. And I have horrible time management so I'm screwed.